Dear Publishers At Random House of Lies:
I reject your rejection of my manuscript. You call yourselves a home to great works of literature, and yet you cast my work aside? Unacceptable.
I have put in a call to the authorities at The Colony, and have mobilized the Naked People's Union. I assume you will be removing your heads from your behinds posthaste, and have thus attached a photo for the book jacket.
The Author, performing one of his infamous Feats of Strength at the Forbidden City in Beijing.
With open disdain for your poor choices,
Naked Man
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